Furby Military Academies

From: Area 51(1/2):
To: Lt. General Julia Webb
Re: Stuff Go BOOM!

It is with deep regret that we must inform you of the loss of the experimental mini-sub "Deep Furb-1". Due to operator error, the device, along with the entire crew and test tank was destroyed.

In analysing the voice recordings, Recruit "Smiley" was having trouble with Torpedo Tube #3 and decided to work it free of the obstruction with a cutting torch. Recruit "Puffy" agreed with the idea and proceeded to "Push every red button I see until SOMETHING happens"

It did.

Our Medical Technician "from the temp service" was quoted on the cause of death as, "They're all icky and smelly!"

Well, THAT certainly explains everything!

Moving on....Our Furby Recruit did little better. Here we see him at HIS idea of Guard Duty at Post 5A. Recruit Rubin with what he called a "doobie".

Recruit Rubin did have SOME potential, this is a shot of him during "Brain Decompression" preceeding "Cybernetic Enhancement Surgery"

Here is Recruit Rubin, now designated "RU-12", enhanced with the AT-2600 Biocomputer and a Laser Guided .45 cal Auto.

We then sent the "RU-12" unit to hunt Ferals and Deserters. The I-SPY 3000 IR unit works very well as seen in this telemetry photo:

Our Security Chief reported that the RU-12 did not return to Area 51(1/2) after its sucessful hunt. He was visibly upset as seen here.

We soon discovered why! Due to a clerical error the Cyborg brain marked "ABNORMAL" was labeled "ABE NORM L." (Then they wonder why I HATE temporary agencies) Since the techs didn't detect the error that brain went into the "RU-12" unit. He/It now has embarked on a new, but rather addled mission: to prevent the future that involves this man.

Tactical Projections indicate that he/it will attempt this by travelling to the past. We are 82% certain that the unit will try to sell Colorado to Mexico, thereby altering the course of history somewhat.

Since I am the Scientific Exploitation Director, it is MY resposibility to track him down. It is due to arrive in the year 1885 + or - 1 year.

I will be waiting for him along with the 1st Furby Time Squad!

Failure is not an option as this might interfere with our funding!!

Continue on to the supplemental procedural report.

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Last Updated 4 Jun 2000

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